hope in the silence (2)

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

- 2 Corinthians 12:9

I love, more than most things, being able to tell people about how God is at work. It is a wholly life-giving thing to be able to rejoice with others, as we tell of all his wondrous works! I suppose this is why I've made such a deliberate effort to share with others our "medically confirmed" inability to have our own children. I guess I did not really need a doctor to tell me that, only having a period once or twice a year, it would be nearly impossible for us to conceive. But having her say it really did make it devastating to me at the time, and so much more glorious as my condition appears to be reversing. 

After much prayer and seeking the Lord on the matter, we chose to forego all other methods and simply see a recommended naturopath and pray that the Lord would use that to bring my body healing. Amazingly, he recommended nothing but a minor mineral (copper), and no other significant changes. Brian and I both prayed diligently, trusting that the Lord could use even this simple remedy to do His healing work. The Lord did not need the copper, of course, and He is faithful and gracious regardless of the outcome... but it appears as though he is using it to make his grace and faithfulness known to us here and now! 

I had blood work done by our fertility doctor two weeks ago and, incredibly, my thyroid levels have improved by 50% and my TSH and LH by almost 100% in only 2 months. Praise be to God! So, we're not pregnant yet, but it looks like God may just miraculously fulfill the hope we have been waiting for. 

The beautiful this is that I can boldly and unwaveringly proclaim that His goodness and faithfulness are overwhelmingly evident to us- even if we never conceive. He is good, all the time, and he is continually giving us hope... not just hope in having a baby, but that in all circumstances He Himself is our hope (Psalm 33:20).

All this being said, today I am rejoicing in my weakness- in my inability to conceive (something so natural; a thing that so many women do accidently, even!). I rejoice in this weakness, awaiting with joy Christ's display of His power in my body. I have seen his healing already, and give praise to his name!